Auntie PanPan’s horrible Horroscopes 2/28-3/6 2022
By TJ Pandora Teer
Hello everyone out there in cyberland!
It’s time for this weeks Horrible Horroscopes from your estranged AuntiePanPan…please put your broomsticks in an upright position as we come in for a landing to see what we can try to forecast for this next crazy seven days that lay before us.
Aries – Well, your birthday is looming out there on the horizon…yes it’s been a year already. Time just flies by when there are several world crises, doesn’t it?? Stop delving into the news so much. Stop feeling angry and do something about your situation instead of just talking about it. DO THE THING.
Taurus – I know you feel like crap sweetie. I know that you feel like ten miles of torn up road and could use a nap. You need to use words like: ‘NO’ and ‘Boundaries’. People need to respect your boundaries or they will just walk all over you. You deserve respect for all the good things that you do for others. On that note..Look around…some people care more than you think.
Gemini – These last few years have not been good for you twins. before you were in the barrel it was the Sagittarians…so now its been your turn for a hot minute. Have you learned your lesson yet? Did you realize the whole world isn’t out to get you? The only one oppressing you …. is you. So get up. Dust yourself off…and keep stepping…unless you’ve decided to just sit the rest of this life out? I mean, yes…taking breaks are important for self care? But there is a definate razor’s edge betwixt Self care and Lazy.
Cancerians – I hope to taste every mac and cheese recipe that each Moonchild makes that is different from the other. I want to make a Cancerian mac n cheese cookbook. And this week is time to get the pots and pans out because its about to be food making time for the masses! You got people that need to eat around you and you are more than wanting to oblige! Enjoy playin mamma hen for a bit. You love it!
Leo – And if there ever was a sign that loves to EAT all the mac and cheese out there made by Cancerians? It’s THIS guy! Don’t be surprised if you are feeling a little more hungry than usual…maybe its because Spring is around the corner and all the world is starting up again…you are out there in the garden playing Farmer Ted enjoying Nature. Enjoy!
Virgo – Stop looking at your phone. I MEAN IT. Put the phone down. Stop acting like a Pisces and cyber stalking your ex. Stop it Stop it Stop it!!!!!!!! No …. seriously… knock it off. You have other crap you need to be working on right now? Your ex is a way to ignore your priorities. . . And cut back on the sauce this week if you know what I mean? You need to have your head in the game next weekend!
Libra – Now that things are becoming more clear to you and hyperfocused? You are realizing that…GASP! You have been doing everything right all along. SURPRISE. I know I know…you thought you were king or queen of the screw ups because that’s what you were implanted was your issue…thanks mom and dad! But guess what? it’s YOUR life. live it. You can enjoy your life now…its allowed.
Scorpio – So much bull pukky goings on around you. It’s not really YOUR drama any more though, is it? NOPE. Actually you have enough going on in your galaxy… if anyone tries to consume your soul ever again? You are ready with Star cruiser battleships. You have a kingdom to rule and an empire to run…Slay baby, S L A Y.
Sagittarius – Watch out for leg cramps this week…did you walk into a wall? Fall off a cliff? are you more accident prone than usual? Look where you are walking and walk where you are looking. Use some caution this week as far as grounding and balance is concerned. Drink your water.
Capricorn – hiding money is fine…but when you can’t find your own cash to pay off issues? That’s a problem. Hoarding dough is ok…but you need to not be a mad rabid squirrel about it. Diversify.
Aquarius – You could end a person with a look or a text. it’s up to you to decide if it’s worth the effort. I’ll let that sink in with you for a minute…
Pisces – You have been wanting to get up and go for quite some time. You thought your situation would change for the better…and here we are in the rut. Luckily you could fix all the things if you communicate. Conversation is not a Confrontation.
So I hope everyone has a wonderful blessed week coming up … I hope to see some of you at the Psychic fair at the Dragon and the Rose in Santa Ana this Sunday March 6th from 11am until 5pm.
Have a blessed week everyone … stay safe…
Kidney bean hearts and will hope to see you soon.